Hope

Hope.

Dictionary.com defines hope as "the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best." Do I have hope? Do I have hope for my future semesters at K-State? My future career as an elementary school teacher? My future beyond that as a future wife and mom?

Can we all help but look to the future?

I can't see myself as a schoolteacher. Granted, I didn't see myself as a college student living in a dorm two summers ago, yet here I am. I feel lost. Like a person swept overboard from their familiar ship into a dark, inky black sea, waves foaming over them in every direction. In my despair, I cry making more saltwater to drown in.

I may not show this pain all the time. Heck, I wonder if I'm the most popular person on my floor besides my RA. Not to get a big head about it... I just wonder... everyone likes to stop by my room and talk to me. Especially the freshman. Man, they are easy to fool with my mask of funniness. That's all I might be to them. Just a cool, funny senior.

To actually see that written out... I know I don't want to be remembered that way. I don't want them to see through my masks to my heart of despair either. I need hope. Not any sort of fake hope like, "o boy, I hope I get a CD for Christmas," but a legit, tangible "I can hope in the Lord, because HE has this all under control."

But I know that I need to look into the dark abyss with that real hope. Too often we think, "I can't trust in God if I don't have hope."
False.
It's the opposite way around. Trust in God PRODUCES hope. "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11 hits the nail on the head. We need to trust him with all-- when all hope is gone.